At 45 years old chronologically, my body felt much older than that. I weighed 277 pounds and had every possible complication of obesity. I had been a Type 2 diabetic for eight years, had high blood pressure, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, arthritis in all of my joints, fluid retention in my legs, and reflux. The arches in my feet were flattening out because of the weight on them, and I was on 14 different medications to keep me as healthy as a morbidly obese person could be. I knew that I would be dead by the time I was 60. How did I get into this situation? I exercised several days a week, and ate mostly whole grains, low-fat dairy products, and some fruits and vegetables, etc. I wasn’t overweight as a child and addiction is not rampant in my family. I believe that it all started in late high... Continue Reading
To get the real joy of the program, you need to give away what you have learned and experienced. You can pray to your higher power to send you people to talk to about this program. When I came to FA, I was desperate, sick, and very discouraged about the way my life was going. In the previous four years, I had gained 50 pounds and was up to 295. I prayed a simple, desperate prayer to God for help. Through my hobby of old cars, I unknowingly met an FA member. He saw my distress and told me about FA. I started immediately. By the first weigh-in, I’d already lost 10 pounds and I was elated. I knew I had the answer to my desperate prayer and was going in the right direction. I felt like hitting the streets as an FA evangelist. (I soon forgot that idea, after... Continue Reading
I went to the California Department of Motor Vehicles to renew my driver’s license. I was especially excited, because after a year of abstinence in FA and a 111 pound weight loss, I wanted to use my new weight on my license. My old license read 230 pounds, which was a total lie. I passed 230 pounds in high school on the way to my high of 300 pounds. I thought if a cop pulled me over, I could pass for 230. I was always in denial about how much I actually weighed. Well today was different. I filled out the form and wrote the exact weight I saw on the scale: 165.0. I emphasized the point zero and handed it to the clerk. She examined the form and frowned, “Are you sure this is how much you weigh?” “Yes,” I say proudly, “one six five point zero.” I thought... Continue Reading
I grew up in a pretty strict household, where food was accounted for. I learned early on to sneak food. My father had a strong work ethic and instilled it in me. By 15, I had a part-time job to pay for my school supplies, clothes, and many other expenses. I was very active in my church and high school sports. I became a Boy Scout Eagle Scout, and had a full-time girlfriend. By 18, my father and stepmother asked me to leave my home, and I set out to find my way in the world with not a penny in my pocket or any idea how to manage my life. I was bitter and pissed and felt that God and my family had abandoned me. But I told myself I was going to make it in spite of it all. Nearly a decade prior to coming into Program, I... Continue Reading
There I was again; my own insecurity was complicating the simplest of tasks. I had been in FA for 15 months, lost 100-plus pounds, and marveled at the changes in my body, mind, and spirit. I could now show up and participate in life…but I still was insecure. My neighbor had asked me if I minded watering the plants, getting the mail, and feeding her son’s goldfish while they were away for a few days. I fed the goldfish a “pinch” of food a day as she had instructed. Wow, was my pinch the same as hers? After all, I am a food addict. Could that be enough for the little guy? A little more couldn’t hurt. The next day I found the goldfish swimming funny. Surely it wasn’t the amount of food I gave him. No, I couldn’t have overfed him. By day three he was a floater—dead. I... Continue Reading
