Posts about Men

Self-Imprisoned

Before I go any further, I should tell you, I’ve never been in a real prison; not the kind you are thinking, anyway. I’ve never even had any trouble with the law. No, my prison was of my own making. I had built it up around me, one block and one bar at a time.  By the time I was well into middle age, I was securely “locked up,” with no escape in sight. When I was young, as far back as I can recall, I was called “fat boy,” “tubby,” and other unkind names, more than I care to mention here. There is an old saying: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” Well, truth be known, the names did hurt me; at least they hurt my feelings.  The name calling got me into trouble because I would retaliate.  Despite my size, I... Continue Reading

 


 

A New Happiness

I walked in the doors of fa at 295 lbs., my physical recovery was only the beginning. At the request of my sponsor, I wrote out five gratitudes a night for several years. Writing out the gratitudes helped me develop an attitude of gratitude. Then it hit me, I became more grateful for what I had than what I didn’t have. Later, I realized I was not only grateful for life but that life was really awesome. Later still, I saw God in everything. All this was a big change, coming from a guy who was chronically suicidal. I learned I had an all or nothing attitude. I was like a light switch. When I was on, I was totally on and when I was off, I was completely off. I needed to have balance in my life. I had to work at living in the gray zone. I had... Continue Reading

 


 

Leading by Example

I am a father of four incredible children, now between 3 and 13 years of age. Prior to entering recovery in FA four years ago, I never viewed my children as assets whom I could cherish.  I saw them as a burdens for me, because they never did what I wanted them or needed them to do. They seemed to be in the habit of not listening to my wife or me. I thought of parenting as hard work. If only the children just did what I told them to do and stayed out of my way! After being in recovery for a couple of years, I was well and truly at my healthy body weight (some 45 pounds lighter), when my 8-year-old son gave me one of the most profound experiences in my short life in recovery.It happened to be the Jewish New Year, and at school my son... Continue Reading

 


 

Transformed

I began life in a small Michigan mining town.  I was a skinny kid for my first six years.  My mom fed me and my siblings a farmer’s diet.  Sweets were plentiful as well. I became a chunky, husky kid during my middle school years.  The summer before I started seventh grade, my parents moved to a new home just outside the town.  I believe that one afternoon changed the course of my life forever. I was biking back home from visiting friends, when a group of about ten kids started running toward me and screaming at me.  I began to get away, when one swung his football helmet and it brushed by my back and hit the seat of my bike.  I broke away, ditched the bike, and ran into my house. After that, I rarely left the protective walls of my home again until I turned eighteen.  I... Continue Reading

 


 

As a food addict, I had no limits on anything I did

As a food addict, I had no limits on anything I did. I had no structure and preferred it that way. When I was told about what I had to do in this program, I balked. I wanted to pick and choose. My sponsors,  and there were many, tried to explain that the tools of this program were gifts, if only I would give them a chance. By weighing and measuring,  I was assured that my nutritional needs were being met. But what I found was that the discipline  of weighing and measuring my food carried into my life, helping me to find a new freedom. It was work , preparing meals, making calls, going to meetings. I was forced to realign  my life , for the better.  Having made a commitment  to program and to a higher power, I was finally accountable. For the first time, I felt some... Continue Reading